Lost in Austen

A few days ago I posted a few 'nice' things covering my all time favorite novel 'Pride&Prejudice' on my Facebook profile! I do know that I am thirthy something and I do have a partner and a kid and so I should already have my share of romance. So my Mr Darcy should have already crossed my doorstep but still....

Ever since I picked my final dissertation subject I got totally hooked! During English Lit classes at college we covered a bit of Jane Austen. On top of that I watched the very addictive BBC series with Colin Firth and there I went. Suddenly I became a true Janeites!

One day I got on the train with my necessary reading material heading back for Louvain City, hoping that I would get into the book asap. Suddenly my fellow passenger noticed me picking up the Pinguin Classic and she just went berzerk!! 'Oh, my dear!! Don't you just looooove Mr Darcy?', she said? To be really honest I had not covered that many pages to really get into the psycho of this rather dark romantic Victiorian loverboy. 'Euh, yes. It is a nice book.' 'Just nice? It the best romantic book that I ever read! Every girl wants to walk into her Mr Darcy!'

By the time we got to Louvain I was intrigued by Mr Darcy. What special forces did he have that other heart robers did not seem to have? Starting that day I woke up with Mr Darcy and most of the times he was the last person I thaught about before I closed my eyes! I even started to have very strange imaginative dialogues with this one classic hero.

Half way through the book I was rather upset with him that he played tricks on Lizzie. They danced at the ball, but he was rather rude and did not treat her with any respect. Lizzie even said outloud many times that he was not worth her love or even her attention.

While reading the novel I digged very deep into every thing I could get my hands on. I challenge you to google Jane Austen, Mr Darcy, Pride&Prejudice and you will be amazed. Guess that I am not the only romantic soul out there who considers this a very inspriring masterpiece. And yes, it seems they even beat me to it: there is a mini series about a modern girl who gets the chance to meet Mr Darcy at Pemberley! Being romantic in modern times seems once in a while rather cliché but when it comes to Jane Austen there is more wit to be found in the dialogues then the average episode of The Bold&the Beautiful.

Lots of women would still be swept of their feet when they would meet the dark and very severe looking Mr Darcy. Because after a closer look at him, he seems to embody all that we are after in a man!

What I do really like about most modern productions is the language of the hands!! It are not the kisses (in Victorian times most women felt already completely on cloud number nince if they were able to touch the hands of their love interest!) but the hands who seem to talk the language of the heart.

Especially in the last movie starring Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfayden the hands tell the whole story. When Mr Darcy is just standing in front of Lizzie playing with his gloves trying to hold back what is on the tip of his tongue you just can feel the tension.

I remember once I was half thru the book that I wanted to get into a time machine and just get to Pemberley in order to tell Darcy that he is such a fool. But then in an other adaptation one chararcter points very nicely out:'We are fools in love!' Apparantly many actors don't mind to play the biggest fool of all!

There is even going on a vote for the best Mr Darcy on the white screen! And seems that this time my Mr Darcy won't be in the lead. Colin will have to get out of the way for Matthew ! Mmh, now that I come to think of it his hands are the most beautiful of all!

Holding hands it seems not that hard but in a Jane Austen novel it seemed to make the difference! I better start using that hand lotion a bit more then just once in a while! You never know when I end up in a time machine!

That one dream!

I still remember where I was when Justine Henin announced her farewell of the tennis court. All I was thinking at that moment while hearing over the radio was: 'Why? Why now?' The days after the news papers were so nice to give the big scoop. Justine was tired of travelling, had a complete burn out, felt a bit out of tune, wanted to become a mother, had won everything there was to win (not true!!) and wanted to find out how life was without running around with a tennis racket! So the why and why now got a decent answer but still it seemed not to make sense.

In two years time the most successful tennis ladies with a Belgian passport left centre court. First Kim and then Justine. Strangely enough they seemed to have certain very personal reasons to announce they were fed up with the tennis world. And hey, I don't blame them! Above all their young bodies already seemed to ache for retirement and they still had to start with the life that most of all call so average but that they seem to long for: a steady relationship and a calm family life!

When people questioned me if I thought that one of them would announce a comeback I was pretty sure about Kim. Justine at the other hand seemed not to send out any clear signal. A few miles away from my home this fierce athlete started her new adventure with the foundation of a tennis academy called the '6th sense'!!

For a tennis lady who played the love game by her own rules a very fitting name. A very long time Juju was out there all by her self and only trusted her senses. Technically I consider her one the best female tennis players that I ever watched playing. Justine her backhand seems hard to comprehend. The purity she hits it with and the efficiency makes your head spin. It is almost poetry in motion. John McEnroe is die hard fan of that one pure shot!

On top of that her emotions have turned her into a very exceptional player. Once this rather tiny player is standing at the baseline she goes for the kill. In most cases she manages to dictate the game and it is not with pure force. If Venus, Serena, Safina, Sharapova are ready to join the special forces then is this girl the best candidate ever to get a MI6 badge. Her game is sleek, very deep going, hard to grasp and sublime! Many opponents will gladly point out that this girl plays the tennis that they just can't stand.

Of course her personal story even made her tennis more edgy. Loosing your mum to cancer after promising she would chase that one dream: winning Roland Garros and this against all odds. This girl had a mission and just think what that one promise did? Her father still remembers how his daughter was obsessed with that tiny yellow object. While she was hitting the ball against the outside walls he was sitting at the dinner table wondering where this was heading for?

Well, we know now!!! The lady with a mission won her Roland Garros tournament 4 times, got the Olympic Gold medal, won the Masters twice, got her name printed in many cups across the world and was number one for a very long time! Justine got the honour to be called a living sports monument by the UN! She is also good will ambassador for Unicef!!! A mission she takes to heart.

So why and why now? Hard to answer! It was so funny to read all the speculations of Justine returning. Like she was once more playing that one game she is so good at! Nobody seemed to figure out for 100% if Justine was seriously considering it. All she did was smiling and keeping her mouth shut.

Two days ago the national TV stations had the honour to have her personally coming over to announce her comeback. Justine looked rather serene and answered all the questions very calmly. And then she spit it out that she still has a few dreams out there waiting for her in the company of a tennis racket. On top of her list still that one cup that she was not able to hold in her hands and granting her life time membership to the All England Club and a nice seat in the champions box!!

Well, that is why! And I do understand why this exceptional player suddenly reconsiders her future plans. She managed to talk Rodrigues to join her once more and in a few weeks she will be back standing down there at the baseline. Ready to face the enemy and chasing that one dream she is after! So, 'Allez Juju', tie those laces of your tennis shoes and grab that racket and walk towards that one field were dreams can be created!

Reasons enough to have a press conference!

P.S.: Hopefully Justine and Kim will have also some icecream after playing some winners! And yes they are both in the picture her above. Believe it or not!!

Busy Bee

Blogging seems once more something that ends up at the end of the list of things to do!! Lately my agenda is bursting with tons of stuff that is considered rather important. Not that I can't handle it but it gives me not always enough space to breath. Here a few things of the my busy list:
- a new job description and all the loopholes. Yes, this girl started a brand new adventure. I am now pedagocical supervisor for one day a week. This means that I will be spending tons of time in meetings, will be working from home more often and will be driving around. My first accomplishment was installing succesfully my new mailbox. Took me ages but I managed to do this without any help of P.
- driving around with A! Besides the rountine drives of and on to school we now get to spend some extra time in the car on Fridays and Saturdays. On Friday he pays the swimming pool of Overijse a visit where R tries to make him swim! He looks like a popsticle when he gets out of the pool and loves to spend hours under the warm shower. On Saturdays he puts on his gymshoes and around noon he jumps once more into a pool. But this pool contains water of 32°C and here it is C who will try to turn him into a future Michael Phelps! Not to mention the outrageously cute swim intructors that walk and swim at the pool!!! For once I don't mind having to hang out at the side of pool!
- filled up weekends with tons of fun like going to the movies, going out for dinner, wedding receptions, birthdayparties and shopping sprays and a weekend in Brugges with friends!
- having the house to myself!! P is in a different time zone for the moment. So this means that I had my mum over for a few days, invited N over for dinner and a good chat, and of course missing P and already counting the days that he will have landed safely! And telling myself over and over that I have to go early to bed in order not to wake up as a zombie!
- trying to get to the student administration office to get my new classes booked and paid!! Not easy if tons of collegues think that my new job description means that they can just call me available whenever they think it suits them! I will have to be bit more the mean collegue then the mean teacher this year!
- cheering for Kim!!! God was I happy that she won once more the US Open tournament and she really gave me a warm glow when I saw her standing down there with that cup and her daughter Jada!! 'The mother of the comebacks', one news paper stated! Well, for sure it gave me something to smile about for a few days in a row!
- planning future vacations. This time I would love to go and visit H! I can't wait to book that one ticket in order to have that one vacation that I am dreaming of already for years. Just hope that H can get some half days off and then this girl will be spending some time in Bush country!
- observing new pupils and coming up with new ideas and tricks to keep them entertained. I can assure you that once more I have some rather interesting ones in my class room. Betting that I will have very lively class meetings about some of these boys and girls!
- surviving the first cold of the season! P had to calm me down once more by telling this is still not the swine flue! But I felt rather sick and I now create a trace of tissue paper every where I go. A also beated the first bad bugs that were passed on while being out on the play ground.
- signing up for Zumba but still not making it to class. I have paid them and I am the proud owner of a new membership card but due to all the stuff described here above I seem not to make into the gym! But if I really want to fit into the dress for N her wedding and look nice in the pictures I do want to loose some weight! P tries to talk (it sounds rather like screaming to me!) into getting some body exercise. Guess I ran out of excuses now and that next Monday it is D-day!
- finding a way of dealing with two jobs! Not that easy and there are moments that I wonder what is expected of me and what not. I feel like Flexigirl and wonder when I have the guts to say no to certain things that people expect of me. Not something that I am every good at.

Best moment of the week was when I saw my mum coming out the kitchen ready to pour the bottle wine into the hot iron!! I LOL and just couldn't stop! It was nice to having her over for a few days in order. Nice extra is that my laundry basket is now almost empty!!! Mum, you are still the best domestic goddess I know!!! I just wonder what my clothes would have smelled like if that bottle of white wine would have ended up in there!?

Splitting headaches!!!

I HAVE A HEADACHE!!!!! And it hurts. Even painkillers don't help. On top of things my bowls don't feel upbeat as well! It is not that I feel that sick that I need Mc Dreamy next to my bed. My blood pressure is perfect ( I do check those things frequently!) and I can function as good as normal.
But hey, after a while you don't want to wander through life with painkillers as your sidekick. They come in handy when A has a very loud day and seems to use living room as frontal stage. And yes, thanks to those super tablets my splitting headache vanished into the thin air before sitting down for dinner at some friends’ house.
Just this time it is different! None of the magic pills seems to kick in! Sleep makes no difference what so ever. Needless to say, that I do feel a bit anxious about this. When I asked P for a consult all he could say was :’I don't think it is tumour!'
Not that I felt any better after that diagnosis. But hey I am happy to know that they are not going to have to dig into my brain to f;
ind the bastard!
Now I keep telling myself that there are tons of reasons why people have headaches. Stress, muscles tension, PMS, sinus infection (P told me that I don't have any sinuses there.
I promised myself to give it some time! As long as my head is not about to explode I will not beg P to call some of his colleagues that are specialised in brain pains.
Up till that moment I won’t stop trying out different ways of pain relief. Coming up: some glasses of champagne in the company of a happy bride and groom! I just hope one thing that when I wake up the next morning that I don’t will have a hang over because then it will be a double portion of pain in the head. But have they not told me once that drinking champagne does not causes headaches! Can’t wait to crack a bottle or four!!!

Maid of Honour-to-be!

It not happens that many times that you wake up on a Monday morning and feel that upbeat. You are try to recover from weekend hangover and hope that that first day of the week will pass asap as it came up on your calendar!

Well, this morning I was feeling not that bad because of I decided just about 18 hours before. A and P were as well a good mood and I was ready to face a typical day at work: dealing with teenagers who don’t want to be in school after two days in better surroundings.

Before I knew my working day was over and I was heading back home. Still, with a smile on my face. Even some of my co-workers had noticed in what good mood I was. Facing the daily traffic jams I even did not mind.

Once I had browsed through the newspaper, read the article about Kim Clijsters beating Venus Williams, I started dinner and hoped that my two men would join me in the very near future to share my last smiles of the day.

Suddenly the phone went! It was N! She told me in a very excited voice that they finally had a date for their fairy tale wedding because they have accomplished their mission impossible successfully: they have got a venue!!!! I was so happy for her because I knew it had cost her and also P gallons of sweat&tears. ‘Good news!’, I was thinking while I went to look for my diary to put down that VID (Very Important Date!!) but then she told me she also had two maids of honour picked!

I personal have this thing going on with weddings but also with some of these rather formal function that some people get to do at weddings. Already for some time I was hoping to be asked. There I was standing in the kitchen and I felt so great!!!

N and I go back some time. We did share some very nice days but also some very gloomy ones. She was there to pick me up at the hospital when I had my sinus-operation, redecorated my studio (that desperately needed a make over!), we travelled together to NYC and Washington DC where she copped with less fun moods in the mornings, we moved both to Brussels at the same time and lived just two streets way from each other and most of all she was there when I was afraid when she would perhaps not be there! Stallie got in trouble or felt very down N was there!!!! And in return I do try to be there for her in the good and the bad times!

Lately we did not manage to get together that much. I still need to inform her about some of the stuff that happened to me personally! Ever since the whole wedding planning started N did turn into one these stress dolls. Every time she called me with a wedding update I kept my fingers crossed that it was good news. And bingo this was the one call she probably had longed for ever since she got engaged!

Hard to describe what I felt like but for me it was the perfect ending of very nice day! My arms were covered in goose bumps and I felt so honoured. So you can imagine that I know don’t get anything done. My head is spinning and I just hope that I will be able to fall asleep! And N, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!! This means the world to me and I promise that I will try to be the best maid of honour that I can be!!! Just very happy that I will have a sidekick as well because then we will for sure be able to turn your wedding in the unforgettable dream wedding that you for sure deserve!

Going up, coming down!

When I woke up this morning I did remember that I had a huge nightmare about my present job. Perhaps it is a side-effect of detoxing of summer but it was a rather scary one. But once I got up and about I did feel ready to make that one decision that I needed to focus one in order to think straight again.
So I around noon I picked up the phone dialed that one number to break the news to the person in waiting for my decission. My heartbeat went wild and I felt quite anxious once I put down the phone. But then it hit me:

- I did it!!!! What I felt so insecure about and wonder if it would ever happen to me happened right there when I dialed those 9 digits.
- I will have that new challenge that I am after! And according many people that I started to bug with my dilemma it is the perfect thing for me to do!!!
- I will be able to learn new things! Not that I don't pick any new things up where I am now but I was desperately after a brand new environment.
- I feel back a more motivated person. For a second there I lost my drive and that was not the Stallie that you want to meet in the mornings or in the evenings. Unless she was joined by a Cuba Libre or two! And hey, teaching under influence is not my cup of tea!

So 48 hours ago I seemed lost and not focused at all. After a successful shopping spray, a smoothie and two men that made me laugh I did feel much more upbeat. In the hallway my newest asset is parked: a brown very cool looking bookbag on wheels!!!! Yes, I got that new Mandarina Duck bag that I was after! And will for sure take that one along on my new adventure!

The only downside(!)of the day was the moment when one of the chairs gave in under my weight! Before I knew I lying on the floor and did I suddenly felt a bit less upbeat! But hey, what goes has to come down once in a while! Now there is a chance that I will wake up with some colors that were not there before. Blue might be one of them but not a chance that I will feel that way when I will open my eyes tomorow morning! Seems like this girl is even looking forward to waking up on a Monday morning! I have already packed my sunglasses to face the very bright skies!

Yes! I am a Capricorn!

I am a Capricorn !!!! Don’t run away now because I am not going to rave about planets and the stars but deep down I do feel there is something right about these things. Why you wonder? And do I have scientific proof of this? Uhm, nope, I don’t but do we really need to analyze every little thing we encounter and deal with?

Yes, I do read my daily horoscope but most of the times when the day already has gone by. It is funny to then find out that some of the stuff described in there did happen that day. Not that I live the life according to what my horoscope tells me to do or don't do! No way, but I just have some of these moments that I can link of some of my episodes right in the profile of a Capricorn.

Especially for the moment I strongly believe that what is going on in my life that I need to show the typical characteristics of a mountaineer! Not that I don’t like mountains. Me having been a student in Austria I found out that mountains do make me feel as alive as possible. A second habitat where I seem to breath easier.

Unfortunately does Belgium only have very old mountains, meaning that they did come down to being rather hills! So no mountains in sight and God do I need them! Like my body is aching for them.

Yes, I did know this was going to happen and that due to the fact that I had a very emotional rollercoaster ride and you know what you can feel like after such a fun trip! Once that adrenaline shot got out of your body you end up feeling a bit numb. This school year I do face not my most fun year. My sixth sense has kicked in! But don’t worry I am very prudent and careful! Guess that the Capricorn is alive and kicking in me for the moment!

In case you consider this all boloney! Personality and character shape you! On top of that parents pour in some of the ingredients they consider important. Well, my dad happened to be a Capricorn as well and my mum is a Cancer. And if I have to believe many I am alike my dad! So?!

In general they say this is about Capricorns:

Traditional Capricorn Traits
Practical and prudent
Ambitious and disciplined
Patient and careful
Humorous and reserved

On the dark side....
Pessimistic and fatalistic
Miserly and grudging

People who have the pleasure (uhm!) will be able to pick out at least three of the ingredients of mentioned here above. Even the dark side ones are damn right!! Yes, I do admit,I can be so pessimistic and fatalistic (so was my dad!!!) and miserly (for the moment big time!). Guess twice, I am having a stay at the dark side. But I am fighting back and hopefully I have been able to make up my mind at the end of this weekend and can I return to my more funny side!

I bet that visiting a bookstore, a nice handbag store and having a smoothie will do the trick. I will have the pleasure to be accompanied by two Pisces. So to make sure that they won’t go for the dark side this afternoon I will be checking out their daily horoscope before we are going out! Hey, I like to be prepared and I am careful! Only I am very pessimistic about what we will have for dinner: the caviar and the lobster we ate yesterday and the champagne bottles are all empty!
Please let the force be with me!!!!!

New talents in the class room!

Well, my first day back at work is history! I did manage to get there in time and I did have my keys close to me this time. Walking through the hallways and trying to find my balance seemed not that bad this time. Still facing the pupils is something that still feels like I am walking for the very first time on high heels.

I then count till ten, before I open up my lesson folder, look into a classroom to know what I heading for. Today I got 9 new kids in front of me checking me out from top to toe! Starring at me and I did stare back.

Me being called a rather mean teacher do spend much time on explaining MY rules.
Guidelines they know thanks to the school regulation booklet but hey, I was a teenager myself and never bothered to read them all. So I made my own list of ten rules that I consider outmost important. Some of them are so straightforward like being polite and helpful. They start to yawn and almost fall asleep. Because I do follow the words of Robbie Williams before picking up my pupils:’ Let me entertain you!' I then turn on my engine one gear higher and we are off.

Remembering speech team I do know that your audience needs some action. That is then exactly what I do give them. Imitations of their own attitudes, jokes they tell, curses, they all get it back! For free and they LOL!!!!! It seems like they recognise themselves right there!

I point out that I will give all my pupils tons of chances but I do hope that they will do their very best as well!!! Pushing forward and grabbing my hand in case of an emergency! No big deal but they will need to show me what they got.
Special Ed kids have no self esteem so ever. They are very vulnerable, shout and kick and go in overdrive in no time. Your classroom can change into boxing ring in no time.

Every year I get into encounters with less smiley faces and yes I will jump right into the action with the risk of getting hurt. These kids feel so out of place in this society. Shame they express when they call their school by name. They would even rip out the first page of their school diaries in order to feel more normal. Some will even admit that they lie when they are asked to what school they go!!!

But I feel so privileged to work with these kids. More then once a year I witness incredible things. When I walk into the woodwork department I face that one bookcase that I would kill for. Or seeing my pupils welding beautiful fences make me feel so humble. The logistic aids that seem to have the patience to talk with sometimes the less friendly over 80 year old people is also something I do admire.

These teenagers have already faced more fights in their lives then I ever will. Every day when they enter the school building they face the one big fear: failure! Life is not always kind to them. School is in some cases the only safe harbour they have left. And yes, the ones that seem so hard to handle are the ones that keep coming back.

The faces I have seen today in my classroom I hope to see them all at the end of this year. But honestly I don’t get too attached to them because some of them will get involved in a very emotional and psychlogical wargame and perhaps will just give up. But they can be also sure that this teacher won't let got that easily!

Me being a religion teacher I do believe strongly in some stuff that is told in the Bible. I love some of the stories that are in there. Sounds perhaps a bit naïve but I do think that in many books with a spiritual message there are meaningful things to be read. The story of the talents was my dad’s favourite in order to point out that you were responsible for making it work.

So this week I am on talent search and I do feel a bit like the jury on Britain’s got talent. The big difference between me and those juries is that I am the one who needs to point out very strongly that they do have talents! Only convincing them of that fact takes also some time. And the harder I shout at them to more I do believe in them!

Hey, yes I made the national newspapers with a quote about my experiences in teaching and those words stand for what lesson I did really learn on day one in Special Ed! ‘When I need help, I will ask for it!!’ is a sentence that I carry into my class room every day of the year. In front of me are not sitting helpless cases but kids who are ready to fight back! And they can relax, sit back and enjoy the show because this 'mean' teacher has got a first aid kit close by. I just hope one thing and that is that at the end of the year that my class room is not looking like a sick bay!