Oh, look at that I have been more then a month not been posting anything out here. I did have the intention to be back sooner but life always got in the way. Life that kept me busy and not alway in the kind way. It did seem like my way into my blog was constantly under attack. More then once I did sit behind my computer and stared at my keyboard thinking that it was the right time to get back on. Some of my friends even wondered what was going on and I had no clear answer at hand that was satisfying them or me why I had this blog-block.
The truth is that I needed a bit time to find back the silver lining in my life. 'Winter is coming', was one of my previous entries abs think that I was able to tackle all the side effects of that season. Oh boy, was I wrong. My mind got frost bitten and it did affect me in a very profound way. Yes, I did try many ways that usually work for me. But this time the effect did not kick in long enough to make me snap out of it.
Yes, the snow and the very cold temperatures and the grey weather made it so much harder this year. Surely I wasn't the only one who cursed the weather. The day that my ballet teacher wondered who had some connections in heaven I realised I wasn't the only one who had trouble to survive the darkness and cold wind. It was like I was doomed this Winter.
Also the places were I tried to find back my sparkle weren't very cooperative. Reading a newspaper became like a mission impossible in order to find good news. More then once I cursed at the headlines while I was trying to tackle my notorious morning moods. The world outside my door wasn't so cooperative either and then it is for me hard work to get through a day unharmed.
So by mid March I was totaly snowed in and very hard to get relocated. Now, I did try to fight back but mother nature out smarted me many times. One moment she sent out the sun in order to lighten up my bedroom but the moment I wanted to suck up some vitamin D she did decide to go back into hiding.
What I try to say that the D word had made a reappearance and I had to spend most of my precious time battling it without walking into mental minefield. Normally I then turn to this spot but this time I did refuse to do so. The thing was I did not wish to turn this blog into a wailing wall. Instead I did try first to deal with this D-intermezzo in different way. Hard work, I can tell you that because the moment I did think I had pushed it into a corner it did fight back. Still, I did not give up this time because I just did not wish to be out smarted by something that would make my life so much more complicated.
The list of weapons I got out to help me out was this one was very long and the list below are just a few of my attempts to chase away the darkness and to make the mind-snow melt faster:
- walks in the woods
- dancing ballet in the bathroom (believe me I can turn pirouettes in that tiny room)
-running up and down stairs at work instead of taking the elevator ('Jeder Gang macht Slank'-motto of my lovely boss S constantly in mind. ;-)
-extra cups of George Clooney coffee with sometimes an extra hazzlenut syrup shot to spice that one up.
-watching tons of new series (Loving Parenthood for the moment!:http://youtu.be/if-Uhm5qvUc)
-spending some more time in Brussels even when it was covered by snow and ice.
-trying to keep up two lent promises instead of one. (one did break just before Easter the other I even managed to keep a day longer)
-reading in the dark with my e-reader (I love that cool tool and you might be surprised where I end up reading now!)
-buying snow-boots and trying too like them (failed, gigantically failed on that part, I HATE THEM!!!!)
-going to bed a bit earlier and hoping to meet up with sleep also earlier
-hunting for an other pair of winter pants (what means that I run in and out of numerous shops and changing rooms numerous times what I hate profoundly, not the mention the number of ...)
-participating in a talent show at work (there are pictures of that one but you will need to bring along winegums, cupcakes or sour candy before I even consider showing them)
-dragging myself into the balletstudio and being sometimes told that I need to try harder (what is the truth but facing that mirror in a frontal position is quite a challenge, believe me)
-seeing the silver lining in many things that in the morning that made me yell internally (snow, rain, icy roads, lost gloves, slippery staircases,etc)
-watching 'Breaking Dawn, part2' and having to face my favorite Twilight character in a certain painful state. Team Carlisle forever!
-ignoring negative news headlines (and that is a killer when you are Stallie because I read, listen and watch many newsreports on a daily basis)
-observing tons of strangers in supermarkets, shops across the nation, metro, parks, waiting rooms, elevators, libraries, churches, museums, parking lots, coffee shops, stations and many more places to find out that the world is an amazing spot to hang out at.
-smiling at the comeback & the sixpack of the Cola Light boy. (http://youtu.be/l7AqpFcgTqQ)
-taking tons of pictures (many will make the final selection for our xmas card)
-looking forward to Monday & Thursday evening to find an other episode of the lovely 'vlog' 'The Lizzie Bennet Diaries (that episode 98 did make my day http://youtu.be/9ncnZjwF50k (spoiler allert if you wish to see first the other 97 episodes! :-)
and yes I did have to meditate in order to keep myself going strong like the energy bunny
That last one is very hard work and it involves more then just listening to sounds of waves, waterfalls, wind chimes and reciting personal mantras... But the effect of that activity I would rather enlighten you with in an other blog entry.That is if I ever manage to put into words what happens inside my mind while I try to push out all the negative energy.
I do think that I might say that I have been busy and that I did need some time to finding my way back in here without dragging in negative energy.
So..... Happy to be back.... Happy that I still know how to snap out of it and finding my way back... Happy... Happy....Happy.... that I still know that I have got my flaws and I always find my way back home but once in a while am tempted to take the detour and leave the trail of the yellow brick road.
Just to give you a slight idea what I listen to at such a moment in my life, three songs that basically tell it all.